I am so emotional right now. I feel the way I did with Moped and Skooter: could I do more to make this work out? If I could put the cats aside I think I could make it work, but I can't put the cats asisde. The girls are over by the sliding door right now, laying down. I love them. I will miss not having them here. I really wish I could make things different with the cats and the fence. Were just not at a point where we can make any changes or adjustments in our lives to accommodate dogs, any dogs. I feel so bad that this didn't work. I had to try it though. I would have always wondered if I didn't at least try. I wanted to give the dogs a chance and give Kris some relief. But it's just not possible. I can't sacrifice the cats to foster dogs. David agrees with me and feels the same way I do emotionally.

I'd like to say that I'll never do this to myself again, but I don't know that I wouldn't try it again sometime when things are different. There's so much going on in our lives right now that I won't get into, but it does effect our decision.

I want to change my mind. I want to keep these dogs. I just can't figure out how to make it work though. This is killing me. I feel so bad.

I haven't heard back from Kris yet. I dread that. I know it will be disappointing to her that it hasn't worked out.

Huxley has come over to me so I can pat her. She's putting her head in my lap and on my laptop. It's like they already know something has changed.

I don't know how much more sadness and disappointment I can set myself up for...