Just thinking

I'm thinking about dogs tonight. Or should I say I'm thinking of all the errors I've made as a dog owner. There are so many things I would do different now that I know what I know. And what is it that I know? I didn't train my dogs early enough or often enough. I did try some with Skooter and Moped but I started too late and wasn't consistent enough with them. Huxley and Blitz are doing great with their new owners because they know how to train a GSP. I don't. Before I can ever consider a dog again, I need to learn how to 'grow' a great dog. I was thinking that getting the dog trained as a hunting dog and as a service dog would help. That was the biggest problem I had when I owned the dogs: I didn't have control over them. The dogs ran the show. It can't be like that. And I would never, ever have a GSP unless I had at least a few acres of property fenced in so they could run around a lot. And I'd have to be committed to walking them EVERY day. And I'm not anywhere near ready to do any of those things so a dog just isn't in my future. But, when one is, I think it will have to be a GSP. I just adore the breed. I really couldn't imagine having any other breed of dog. I look at other dogs and puppies and they are cute, but they just don't compare to the GSP.

I know I'm not ready to own a dog. I don't know that I ever will be ready. I know I'm not a good dog owner. But it doesn't keep me from loving the dogs I've had. I'll always see them as my boys and girls. I'll always miss them. But I know that I just can't handle a dog at this point in my life. And that makes me sad.

I have been doing some research on therapy dogs. There are what they call Emotional Support Dogs for people like me who deal with depression (amongst other things). They are not Service Dogs. They don't get to go into public places like service dogs do. But they are trained to help people how have emotional issues. Maybe a dog like that, one that is already trained would be a good dog for me one day. It would still have to be a GSP though. I'd have to get it as a puppy and put it through ES training.

I know. I know. I shouldn't even be thinking about this stuff, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't. I still check the Rescue website daily to see if any dogs have been placed. I'm always happy when a GSP gets adopted. And I just like looking at their sweet faces. I wish I could do more for the Rescue (beyond or in addition to our monthly donation). It's such a worthy cause.

It's funny but once you have a GSP, there just is no other dog for you. Which isn't great for someone like me who takes them in and then lets them go. One of my friends said that I have a mental illness about dogs. She was serious. I don't know. Maybe I do have a screw loose when it comes to GSP's. But gosh, they are just the most wonderful dogs in the world. So smart (when trained) and such great companions (again, when they are trained).

Guess I'm feeling nostalgic and meloncholy tonight. Minnie has been sitting on me for hours. Whenever I sit, she's on me. And Paulie, when he's not on me, is on David. I want to let them go next week. I just can't handle them any more. If I bring them to the Humane Society they may be euthanized, but I feel like it's them or me. Their lives or mine. I want my life back sans cats, dogs or any other pet. No fish, hamsters, gerbils or squid. Nada.

Still, GSP's rock! And they always will.